One of those days...

Oh great, it's gunna be one of THOSE days. I just got off the phone with my friend and his girlfriend and they were all cheery like all of those cute little couples are and it just got me thinking about how much I want that to be me. I haven't had a girlfriend since Faith and I broke up over 16 months ago, and until lately I hadn't even had any interest in me from anyone. My recent sexcapades don't do anything for me, which is why I told the girls (I wasn't with them at the same time) that I can't do what we were doing anymore. I may be the only guy who will pass up no strings attached sex, but I'm looking for more. I surprised myself even when I crawled into bed with them, I just don't do things like that, I'm too much of a relationship guy to do things like that. I guess my hormones kicked in and took over a few times, but like usual after a while my mind and conscience took over. Anyway, so here I am sitting here thinking about how much I miss having someone around all the time and feeling like I'm loved or needed. It sucks playing the role of the 5th wheel everywhere I go. Let me tell ya it's so much fun going to dinner and having people look at me like I'm the loser friend who couldn't find a date on Friday night so I just tagged along with my friends and their girlfriends. It's a pretty cool feeling. Catch the sarcasm yet? (OK, this has nothing to do with what I'm talking about, but the new Destiny's Child video just came on and I'm definitely a fan of three beautiful women huddling together naked.) Back to the subject at hand... So, after giving up the search months ago I think I'm going to go back on the prowl for a new love. I know people say that once you stop looking it will find you, but that hasn't worked, so back to the drawing board. I just hope my ego can handle more rejections.